Blog Archives

Reader, I finished the book.

May 3

Posted by

“One morning I fell to sketching a face…a very faithful representation of Mr. Rochester”

     
     I loved reading Jane Eyre. I know, I know it’s a classic everyone loves it, but no! Remember how much I couldn’t stand Tess of Dubervilles? I loved Jane Eyre. It seems all I could think of when I would hear of Jane Eyre, or see the book, was this crazy lady setting fire to things and dashing a young girls hope at marriage. It is so much more.
     As a young girl she made me jealous that I wasn’t able to articulate my passionate frustrations at the world with the same freedom and grown up language. As a young teacher then governess I was proud of her for becoming so graceful, yet not losing the edge that makes her feisty in her intelligence. As a heart broken survivor trying desperately to be independent I was amazed at the way she came full circle; for when she was a child she declared she would never want to live with poor people or be a beggar, yet when it came down to it she was able to do both and still hold her head high.
     The balance in her very being is what makes her story one of the greatest love stories ever written. She has a fiery passion mixed with a soothing grace that causes me to feel amazed. I would call her character growth monumental. Hers is the growth other novels wish to attain for their own characters. I know I said I was not looking forward to the introduciton of Mr. Rochester, as I liked Jane very much without him. While Jane’s character growth is amazing, and beautiful to watch, so is the wonder of how she keeps who she is alive and protected throughout the entire novel. She never wavers, never changes for anyone, and does not sacrifice who she is for whomever is around her. A strong woman.
   Oooo and what about that creeper St. John? Didn’t you just want to smack him?
Over and out for today people, take good care.
Moi xoxo

Posted in Books, Life, The Universe, And Everything.

Leave a Comment

Tags: ,

Getting Mad, Being Angry, Growing Up.

Apr 29

Posted by

     Today found me severely angry. I was mad due to what I perceived to be a petty and un-just move by a work colleague. I should also state for the record, this move did not affect me in any way, but that didn’t matter to me at the time. Usually I email people when I’m mad. I think I make up witty and water tight arguments that expose them for the frauds they are. However, I usually expose myself for being easily angered, unforgiving, and unmerciful. Also spiteful, mind as well write them all down.
     How does one right wrongs without calling out the ones who are wrong? How does one be passionate without being overly excitable? Balance is sorely needed, and I am finding myself quite surprised by the lessons I am learning in this book.     
     I cracked through quite a bit of Jane Eyre last night. She’s now living with the St. John’s in the Moor House. But I still love young Jane much more than older calmer Jane, (who is about nine years younger than me, but no biggie). Younger Jane got mad, and when she got mad she let people know. I get mad, try to tell people why, and end up crying hot angry tears “A La” Ms Halcolmbe, or emailing scathing letters… but I’ve told you that. One of the many frustrating things about that state of mind, is you can’t express yourself the way you want to.

     If people were always kind and obedient to those who are cruel and unjust, the wicked people would have it all their own way: they would never feel afraid, and so they would never alter, but would grow worse and worse. When we are struck at without reason, we should strike back again very hard; I am sure we should – so hard as to teach the person who struck us never to do it again.
     Ah  justice I breathe justice. My favorite part of Disney’s “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” is when Esmeralda yells justice. Ahhh, but who is the most just of them all? A surprising young student pointed me back the way I had forgotten I was supposed to go.



Click on pic for link to where I got it. [There's a swear in it... lol]


     Thank God for Helen Burns. I forgot about her from the movie. Her quiet acceptance, (yes too quiet, too accepting), of her un-justified punishments by that harsh old teacher at Lowood struck Jane with just as much curiosity as that same attitude in people strikes me.

“You dirty, disagreeable girl! you have never cleaned your nails this morning!”
Burns made no answer; I wondered at her silence. “Why,” thought I, “does she not explain that she could neither clean her nails nor wash her face, as the water was frozen?”
Helen had an answer for both of us;
Helen: “It is weak and silly to say you cannot bear what it is your fate to bear.”
Jane: I could not comprehend this doctrine of endurance…I felt that Helen Burns considered things by a light invisible to my eyes. I suspected she might be right and I wrong; but I would not ponder the matter deeply: Like Felix, I put it off to a more convenient season.

     Jane’s season came much sooner than anticipated, the very next chapter has her being unjustly punished in front of the entire school. Despite thinking she was going to freak out and yell them all down because, “I was no Helen Burns”, (probably one of my favorite lines so far); she withstands the persecution mutely. But why? It may have had something to do with Helen’s faith. Helen answers Jane’s earlier questions about how she could possibly stand the un-justified cruelty with this example; “It is not violence that overcomes hate – nor vengeance that most certainly heals injury.”
   So when my ‘just’ little conscience jumps up and starts screaming for and eye for an eye I must re-tell myself what I once knew by heart. 
 Read the New Testament, and observe what Christ says. and how he acts; make his word your rule, and his conduct your example… Love your enemies; bless them that curse you; do good to them that hate you and despitefully use you.”
     Thank God for Helen Burns. Vengeance is not mine, I constantly screw it up. And to those that would say “If we love everyone then where is justice?” Well, Justify in love why don’t you? Instead of taking pride in pointing out the wrong, do it because it must be done, and with no malice. For we are all children playing at being adults, and when Jane speaks her mind and vengefully slams her evil stepmother, the result is unexpected.
First, I smiled to myself and felt elate; but this fierce pleasure subsided in me as fast as did the accelerated throb of my pulses. A child cannot quarrel with its elders, as I had done, cannot give its furious feelings uncontrolled play, as I had given mine, without experiencing afterwards the pang of remorse and the chill of reaction.
     No I am not a child, but when I speak as a child in anger, I feel like a child in shame. As much as I enjoy the young Jane more, and find her fiery and feisty, I strive to be more like the older Jane. One I will write about later, as I am no longer angry, and hopefully will stay away from emailing anyone anytime soon. You see, I am growing up.
Moi xoxo
    
          

Posted in Books, Life, The Universe, And Everything., Progress

Leave a Comment

Tags: ,

Beavers or Ducks?

Apr 11

Posted by

I finished The Great Gatsby. I decided to underline it due to latent English lessons always haunting me when I write a book title and make no indication it is a book. Mrs. Mac would’ve killed me if I handed in a report without the proper punctuation. So upon finishing the book I was once again at a loss as to which book to read next. (Yes I am still avoiding Tess, although I am plunking away at it slowly. She’s finally agreed to marry Angel, but we know it’s just not meant to be, poor girl.) I asked the boyfriend if he could pick a book off the list for me to read and he so helpfully said- “The first one”. “I’ve already read that one” I said so he countered with “the first one from the top you haven’t read yet, I wouldn’t make you re-read a book!” “oh”.
I was looking for a fun way to pick a new book, or a unusual way. One of my most cherished ways to pick something when I can’t make a decision is to assign a code word, or letter, or number to each and ask people to pick one. Here’s an example. I was trying unsuccessfully to decide between Maple Glazed Salmon, and Curry Rice Pot from a restaurant so I ask TBF “Beavers or Ducks?” He is quite aware of my strange system so he picked Beavers, which were assigned to the Curry, so I ate Curry. (It was great.) My brother DogTango knows about this too and hates it. He gets all freaked out and says “I need to know what it is I’m deciding for you! This is crazy!” He’s the type of guy who likes all the information… I find it amusing. I have asked waitresses, friends, relatives, and innocent bystanders in a mall to make my decisions for me. It’s fun, and liberating. But I have a problem; how to do this when no one is around?
Mr. Jones! I am going to buy myself this, one day when I have money. This watch has been on my wish list for a year now. I think it’s one of the coolest ideas out there! Of course if you browse the watches on his page you’ll see he’s a genius. I love the “remember you will die” watch as well. However, I am left with using people until then. TBF is getting annoyed with my deciding methods now, so he’s picked the boring approach, but I will listen. Jane Eyre! She was third from the top, and easily located on my bookshelf as Gatsby was sitting beside her a week ago. I’ve watched the movie a hundred times, so there will be limited surprises on a certain closeted crazy. Until the next fun time… and should I have tea or coffee now… ?

I never toss a coin for one simple reason. I can never catch it again.

Posted in Books, Life, The Universe, And Everything., Progress

Leave a Comment

Tags: , , ,

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 96 other followers